Canada Wins Gold!

As you probably can tell the 2006 Winter Olympics were still going when the monthly poker game came around this month. Yes I am sure Canada won a few gold medals. In fact they won the gold medal for curling. Now how a game where you sweep a broom in front of a rock sliding on an oversized frozen shuffleboard is considered an 'Athletic' sport and worthy of the ancient Greeks is beyond me.

And if it is, then why the hell not poker?

It's just one of those great mysteries in life. Kind of like how does Pringles get all their potatoes chips the exact same size and shape? Just what kind of mutant potatoes are they feeding us?

That, I think, falls into the X-files category.

Ok I'm digressing and this is a post about poker. You know that game played in smokey casinos with fat bald guys and little paper cards. You know the one that is all the rage on ESPN, "The Sports Network", and yet it is not an Olympic sport.

Did I mention that curling is?

I'm off track again aren't I?

Once again the monthly game is being hosted by the Diabolical Mr. Kim. to his left around the table is Clint, John, Myself, Fred, Craig, River Dance, and Napoleon (Frenchy).

Missing is George from last month. I'm thinking we intimidated him too much with our betting style. I guess we checked into him way too often.

I know when someone checks to me I want to fold too. I just makes me think of some crazy Russian mafia guy who is going to break my legs and leave me for dead in an alley if I take all his money.

Now I open with my best hand of the night. I'm deal pocket 4s I bet lightly and get some action. The flop?

4, 4, something, yep that is right I completely did not pay attention to any of the cards that came after. Why should I, did they even matter?

I get Won to bite, bet the pot a few times before revealing the 4s at the end.

Yep I was glad to get that out of the way. Best hand I was going to see all night and it was dealt in the first two hands.

To follow that nifty piece of action Frenchy, bullys everyone out of a had with a whopping bet of $40. We all ran like scared school girls.

There is also a reason I mention this.

But we will get to that later.

However I can't stop mentioning the Frenchman. Why? Cause something rather amazing happens early.

Fred and Frenchy are into a hand deep. Both staying in with decent betting. Sitting in the middle we have 6c, 10c, 8s, 4h, Qh.

They both call and flip, Fred shows 10's and 5's. But Frenchy has 10's and 6's.

Have you been following along on your score sheet at home?

Because if you had been you probably would have noticed that Frenchy has never actually Frenchied anyone before. It had always happens to him.

I mean where the hell do you thing the term Frenchied came from?

But not today my friend, the Frenchman exacted his revenge and finally put the screws to someone else.

Personally I think we should pitch in and get a little bronze statue to mark this momentous occasion.

Ok, so I'm going over board there, but hey its my blog.

Besides a few hands later Ken frenchied him right back. Oh, come on, you knew it had to happen at least once during the night.

It was named after him after all.

Play moves slow for a while the only major thing is Clint taking a large pot off Ken with a set of 6s to Ken's two pair. Which he then follows up with another large pot off of John.

Oh, and then Frenchy buys another pot.

Action moves along until shortly after 10 when Fred goes all in against John and Craig, Craig takes Fred out and a large bite out of John with a full boat, Aces over Kings. Not something you see very often. But as I have mentioned before the man doesn't bluff.

We say goodbye to Fred early.

We then get another sage piece of poker advice. I can't recall who said it and when, it might have been Clint, but someone was debating what to do with their hand when the comment; "Let me see what you have and I will tell you what to do." is mentioned.

Mind you Clint (or whoever it was), was still in the hand and had raised the bet. This goes right along with 'if you are going call I'll fold'.

I can only imagine what real poker players might think of us should they sit down at our table.

Then again I might not want to know.

Moving along Frenchy is getting bold when he buys yet another pot.

It would be so strange if he didn't do in again with in a hand or two.

At this point he has pulled down five pots by buying them. Either he is getting hard to read or we are just chicken shits to call anyone anymore.

I vote for the latter.

But it is all rendered meaningless when Won catches Frenchy in his own personal Waterloo and hands Him is ass. Not cleaning Him out mind you, but taking a very large portion of His chips.

Then He has the final axe fall when He goes all in against Ken who gets a pair of Queens and poor Frenchy has nothing but King high.

Ah the French succumb the German blitzkrieg. We should expect this by now shouldn't we?

Then the diabolical Mr. Kim bets hard and furious at us one hand. I think it might even have been after the flop, but so shocked was I that I failed to write it down.

Was I was shocked that he bet? Hell no, we all bailed and before I could take notes he showed us is cards.

7-2 unsuited.

THE HAMMER!!! He bluffed us all out with the hammer.

That was why I failed to note it, I was too pissed to remember. I think I might even had something decent but the bet and the cards on the table had me thinking he had something.

Fool me once shame on me...

KIIIIMMMMMMM!!!!!!

I shall have my revenge.

Now we get the hand of the night, Ken and Clint go at it all in. We get 5h, 2d, 4, Jd, 6s, with Ken showing As, 10s. and Clint...

...Well Clint had pocket Aces.

This puts a big dent in to Ken and gives Clint the current chip lead.

Then came the second best hand I saw all night. I get Ac Qs. I go all in preflop and I get Won and Clint to bite.

However, with both of them in more then me there is a side pot. So I don't get to see anything until the end. Community cards are, 9h, Qc, Jc, Qh, Kd.

Woot! I have a set of queens and thinking I have it Clint and Won call each other and show...

...AJ for Won. I am so thinking I have this. Only card that could screw me is a...

...MOTHER%#@*&%! 10. Yep that's right Clint had pocket 10s and takes my ass down. Not to mention a chunk out of Won.

Oh well I have piss poor cards all night, not much I can do. I managed some decent hands here and there but it just wasn't there tonight.

Ken follows me not too much later, getting taken down when he goes all in trying to keep his hopes alive, by Craig's set of Jacks.

Then Won goes all in, I think it was an outside shot at buying the pot or a check raise, Clint throws him off by going all in.

Won looks him in the eye and tell him "Fuck you" then on the luck of the cards takes the pot and doubles up anyway.

However he promptly loses a large portion of that to John, who bails out his steadily declining chip stack to stay alive a bit longer.

Then Clint, Craig, and Won go all in. With Clint holding the chip count over the two of them he could bust them both out. We get the show of cards. Won has Ks 10h, Clint 2c Jc, Craig Ad 5c. Flop is Qs, 7c, 2h. Clint has an early lead with a pair of twos. Turn is 4s, no help. River is 2d. This gives Clint a set of twos and we say good bye to Won and Craig.

This leaves only John and Clint. I did mention that Frenchy was out right? I'm sure I did.

Well it doesn't take long when we get John all in with Ad 8c against Clint's Kh 5h. Well we see 2c 10h 2h on the flop. John has it with a pair and the Ace kicker, but the dies on the turn when the 3h comes up completing Clint's flush. 3d on the river is moot as John was drawing dead.

And there you have it. Clint wins a wad of cash, but he won't get the gold medal since Poker isn't an Olympic sport. He'll have to join the curling team to get that. We will just have to wait until next month to for me to get my title back.

It just wasn't in the cards.

And I leave you with the quote of the night. "The bet is two thousand to you. I check."